Happiness is a choice.

I am tired of being a monologue-er.

Really.

In fact I am tired of eating up all the nonsense from the people around me.

Double sigh.

Yet, I am being too nice and has not transformed to be "meaner" like I want to.

I just cant +_+

I've  tried very hard to be mean but saying NO to my surroundings are definitely cant be done up till today.

The great feeling on earth is to see people that you love is happy.

But, by accomplishing that..I always get the heartache in return.

Yet, I cant make everybody that I love being really happy around me.

I just can't win it all.

I am very passionate and always have full determination when comes to accomplish my target.

Saying NO is not an option at all.

But, what do I received in the end.

Zero for me...Hundreds for anyone else.

Yes. yes. I am really tired indeed.

Unfortunately, I left with no choice at the moment.

I have to go through every single nonsense everyday.

Being really happy is actually something that I havent felt for a looong time in 2013.

I have to be selfish.

I need to find my happiness in whatever method that I might use.

I thought I am happy when people around me are happy.

But turns out.. I am totally wrong.

A changed in this matter are truly required a.s.a.p

Since happiness is a choice and I want to feel truly happy again.

One week after 1st Ramadan...oh, I served my cuti already. lol ^_^

Few reminders for us to be thankful

After less than a year waiting..
Ramadan Al-Mubarak has finally arrived. Alhamdulillah. Yay!
I am not too religious yet I know where I'm coming from  and what are my responsibilities as a human.

Life is never bored as we always being tested with too many issues.
As we are still alive...we are always surrounder by problems and issues that needs our attention.
Well, I am at the stage where I wanted to be in my cocoon and not to bother about other people
Which I have practiced that kind of life for sooo many months..
Not having social life and limit my circle of friends as small as I can.
That is how I deal with my life issues and turns perfectly fine (as of now)

Well, this holy month could make me realized that whatever happens, I have to be thankful to God as I am still breathing and be able to do things that I like and I am healthy!
Money could buy you happiness but there is one thing that money can't buy ... :)

Few reminders came across my mind for the past few months makes me feel that I have to think about the other side part of life.

Be nice, Lea.
Be grateful and do more good things in life as you may never know what the future holds.

Salam Ramadan to everyone.
Enjoy this +-30 days of barakah and no matter what problems you are currently encounter, please have faith as He is always be with you!:D

Oh.. Its July already?? :O

Newly discovered.

From the outside- I might look mean, aggressive and garang.
Apparently, most of the negative attitudes has been associated with me for so many years.. I didn't really bother about it that much.

So, I always think that I am mean, aggressive and precisely garang.
But, recently I realised something that I have not discover about myself for so many years.
In fact, I didn't even know that I have this particular quality in myself.

I am being too nice with my surroundings. Yes! I am.

After almost 28 years living in Allah's land..I finally understand.
The attitude that I've shown to people actually its just a visor of myself.

I am particularly the most soft-hearted woman, the most caring, who easily forgive, who always said 'Its okay..or takpelah' when people stepped on me and used me whenever they want.

Just because I always prioritise other people's happiness..which I believed their smiles are matter the most and I can always be happy to see people around me to be happy even I had to makan hati or be suffered at that time.

Surprisingly, I just got to know that I always being bullied by my surroundings. Just because I want the people around me to be happy. I seldom say 'No' when people asking for help. I will always determined to fulfil the needs of people that I love in this world- with the hope that they will love me and appreciate me more. After all, life is so short..so, make as much as good deeds as you could-That is always be my motto of life.

Anyway...today, I guess I should change that perception.
I have to think more about myself.
I have to make myself happy 1st then only make other people smile.
I have to stop sacrifices for something that I shouldn't.
I have to learn how to say NO!
I have to put away some of the sympathy towards people who always asked for help.
I have to love myself more than I love anyone else in this world.

Saying something is so easy.
To execute - as a matter of fact..is really hard to do.

I am trying not to be TOO NICE now.
I always say that I am a selfish bitch who normally don't give a shit.
But somehow.. I am the most nicest person whom I ever known and I'm done being nice for people who didn't recognise the existence of me being here.

I'll try to be mean when I needed to be.
I'll try not to think about what my people will say..
I don't like to change..but I guess the changes are the reflection of what they were doing for so many years..

Do you love yourself? Yes? Really?
You better think again as I just realised that I don't love myself enough all these while.

Btw, being too nice to people doesn't really bring any good. Be mean sometimes..so you'll realised how great is the feeling of a real happiness and self satisfaction.

Afterall, people's satisfaction aren't mine anymore.. ;)
*But firstly... how to say..NO?* +_+

•Lea@Alia•Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device via Vodafone-Celcom Mobile.

Dreams do came true.

Ya. Dreams do came true.
As example, the headband that I was wearing in the picture which specifically in purple.
Been thinking of having it since 8-9 years old and finally after 20 years...I finally get it!

Sometimes, simple things in life are the one that makes your life more meaningful.
I am currently dealing with a lot of issue..I guess everybody are also in my circle.
Life is short...really.
Just do something that makes you happy and keep it simple as much as you can.
That is what I've been doing now.

Its June..and July is just around the corner.
Be grateful and dont stress yourself with nonsense issue that doesn't bring any good.
Its easy for me to say..but I also find it hard to execute. Haha.

After all, what matters the most is we are still be able to live and He is always there for us. :)

Next- I'm gonna find this thing call "polly pocket". :P