Glad

Sharing a perfect happy moments with others is the only thing that I could do now.

Nothing much.

I am glad to share the happiness around me as I am waiting for my happy moments to reach the stage.

The pain is still there.

I mean my gum.

Is not a happy thing to be share with you guys.

But some people makes me smile with their happy news which I could share with.

Glad that some people are moving forward...Glad to see some of my friends are getting a raise..new job..promotion..glad to see some friends are getting engaged...Glad to share a wedding bliss with some friends..Glad to hear great news of their newborn...

God...that makes me feel so old. Muehehehhee..

and glad to see that some friends are still with me even they are aware that I am a total ATTENTION SEEKER!

;-)

Stay tuned.

More to come.

Heh! ;-)

Dua batang.

Gambar dibawah mungkin sedikit menjijikkan.

Tapi ketahuilah kalian bahawa dua batang gigi inilah yang mampu membuat hidup aku tunggang langgang selama beberapa hari.

Berdenyut-denyut.

Tidur malam tak lena.

Kepala sakit dan kacau bilau segalanya

Gigi Bongsu yang degil bersembunyi selama beberapa tahun di dalam gusi sudahpun ku nyahkan.

Minor dental surgery di hari Selasa tengah hari telah melayakkan aku menerima anugerah MC selama 4 hari.

Derita.

Darah mengalir ..air mata meleleh.

Pasrah.

Mahal pulak tuh!

Sekalung terima kasih ku ucapkan pada manusia yang meminjamkan tangannya untuk digenggam tatkala sakit dan ngilu datang menyerang sewaktu proses membius, mengorek dan mencabut dijalankan.

Gusi dipotong, mataku pejam.

Bius dicucuk ke gusi yang semakin membengkak membuatkan pipiku kebas dan berdengung.

Seksa.

Ini baru gigi.

Kalau sakit nak beranak..macam mana pulak?

Tak pernah sangka yang penangan gigi bongsu degil ini mampu memberi impak besar dalam kehidupan seharian..

Orang cakap

"Ala..sikit je tu.."

"Normal la..nothing big!"

Aku rasa nak sepak je manusia2 heh yang kata kesakitkan yang aku lalui ini tidakla sakit mana pun!

Cuba korang kena. Apa rasanya.

Dr gigi yang baik budiman berwajah elok menyejukkan hati

Dr wanita melayu bernama Masyitah.

Terima kasih kerana membantu dan akibatnya muka aku bengkak sebelah.

Pipi kembong.

Dah tak lawa dah! Haha

Mak risau.

Lalu aku membungkuskan diri sendiri, dengan mengumpul kekuatan jitu sebagai anak perempuan abah yang lasak..lalu meloloskan diri melalui lebuhraya utara selatan.

Drive sorang tahan demam. Macam nak rak jugaklah

1.00 pagi, Rabu.

Tibalah aku di pusat rehab di Taman Kenanga.

Adik perempuan yang sorang tersengih-sengih.

Aku kasi tunjuk dua batang gigi yang akan ku simpan bikin pusaka sampai bila-bila.

Ngeri.

Tapi yang pasti.

Nikmat makan sedap tak dapat la dirasai tekak seminggu dua ni.

Aiskrim..mashed potato..blergghh..dah macam bayi!

Kempunan nak merasai makanan pepejal yang sedap2 ini ,mungkin berlarutan sebab minggu depan nak bukak jahit di gusi dan cabut sebatang lagi gigi sebelah kanan atasnya.

Oh..gigi geraham bongsu...

Kasihani la saya..

Yang penting, hati da senang bila dapat menyedut udara bandaraya Johor Bahru yang selalu dirindui

Yabedabedu!

Rehab session starts now, baby!

*Terima kasih buat teman yang menemani dikala sakit gigi yang sangat HEH ni*

Dalam nampak kecik..bila keluarkan..mak ai..da besar panjang rupanya! Siap akar senget2 pulak tu.. Haihhh la gigi..

The Ugly Truth

Currently, I have been watching a lot of "chick-flick" movies through my dvd player and my cute little 14 inch tv.

Especially when I wanted to restrict myself from facebook-ing a lot and stop depending on internet at home. This is include...The ugly truth.

Katherine Heigl is one of the fav actress that always catching up my mind. Since the revolution of Greys Anatomy..

Tell me about it..shes hot isn't ;-)

Well..its not about the movie I want to touch here.

Its just one of the dialog between her and the actor, Gerard Butler.

"The truth is always ugly, isn't"

Is that true?

Well, in her situation on that movie, yup.

In love, in life..SOMETIMES..

the truth is always ugly.

Those beautiful, excellent and flowery moments that you went tru with your partner..its not the truth.

When you are in love..automatically the feelings are blooming with respect and expression.

Everything that shes done or he did was a great moment.

That is called love.

But when you guys reach certain stages when the "reality hits", you will see a lot of ugliness of that particular person..

Whatever that he/she used to do doesn't bring any joy anymore.

Thats called "reality"

The fantasy is over.

Relax and enjoying the moment.

These are the tests that you need to go through in order to make your relationship works.

I am nobody here to talk about the greatest love of all.

But as a normal human being..I am pretty sure, those moments already hit me so many times.

Some of it - I am excellently went tru it with the guts that I had and some of it- Its disappear just like that.

How?

"the relationship- doesn't work"

Therefore, I am really proud to see people who still madly in love with their partner after years..this is including a happy marriage where they are not only live in their fantasy but went through the reality. Bravo! :)

What am I here?

Single and ready to mingle.

But I do have some concern on getting into a relationship..

Its just me, asking myself this question-

"Could I accept the ugliness ..even I know that is the truth?"

;-)

I always wanted to live in fantasy.hehe.

Ayam Rusia berkaca mata

Ayam Rusia berkaca mata.

Aku terasa tua.

Mata da rabun silau dan sedikit rabun jauh.

Ini semua mengakibatkan sakit kepala yang kronik bila tak dirawat sebetulnya.

Jadi, dengan ihsan manusia bernama John, designer terulung..aku dapatlah pakai cermin mata yang fetish ini.

How do I look?

Mata semakin terang. Bila drive malam-malam rasa lapang. Hati pun senang.

Dulu selalu fetishkan wanita berkaca mata begini.

Fun and intelligent at the same time. (Masuk bakul angkat sendiri)

Sekarang, perlu kah Fetish pada diri sendiri?

Muehehehhee..

Ayam Rusia berkaca mata.

Ok kot. ;-)

Hujan rintik-rintik

Hujan rintik-rintik dekat luar.

Dalam hati dah lebat membasahi jiwa.

Faham?

Tak mungkin

Mak kata sabar.

Aku tersengih je. Rasa nak campak telefon cap ayam tu.

Bukan nak apa pun.

Cuma nak hidup ini jadi realiti yang indahnya bagai mimpi.

Keseronokkan tidak bertepi.

Mana mampu dicapai mimpi yang indah

Namun, hidup semakin mencanak-canak kebosanannya.

Tengok hidup orang memang seronok.

Senang je- bak kata ida

"What is wrong with us?"

Its just US.

That is where it went wrong.

=p

Sebenarnya takde apa yang wrong pun dalam kehidupan seharian

Cuma zaman gelap yang membosankan datang bak awan hitam meliputi bumi.

Aku banyak melamun semenjak dua ni.

Meraung- hanya dalam hati.

Ketenangan tak dapat di capai semenjak dua ni.

Nampak hebat dan fabulous sehari-hari.

Dalam jiwa, tiada apa yang dinanti.

Orang bisa gelak..aku pun sama boleh join.

Tapi bila aku nangis diam-diam ..banyak orang tahu dan cakap

"SABAR lahhhh"

Benci dengan perkataan itu.

Hidup kena ada matlamat.

Kosong rasanya.

Apa yang sebenarnya aku nak?

1. Companion - sila cakap aku desperate. Tapi hakikatnya, itu lah dia.

2. Holiday- itu semua orang pun nak

3. Duit- ini lagi semua pun mau

4. Balik JB- KL tak sehebat yang disangka.

5. Kegembiraan dan kepuasan hati- sama macam manusia2 lain.

Manusia-manusia mungkin rasa hidup aku enjoy. Ditambah pula dengan status2 panas di FB.

Sakit tau tak?

Ingat happy ke?

Tidak lah. Cubaan menghappykan diri bermula disitu.

Konsep hidup makin jauh tersasar.

Jiran sebelah rumah berborak dengan aku dan ingatkan aku andalusia yang dah hebat hidup sendiri.

Kepala hotax! Ingat seronok?

Benci. Rasa nak sekeh je kepala brader tu. Nasib baik dia jarang2 berkunjung ke rumah pusaka arwah bapak dia ni.

1.26 am - Dah hari ahad.

Bohsan..

Sabar. . Sabar..Sabar..Sabar..Sabar..

Wahai cahaya keseronokkan..serlahkan lah dirimu.

Awan hitam, sila blah.

Boleh?

;-)

Weekend.

I used to love the weekends.

To the max.

But now I hate it the most.

Bosan tahap gaban.

Maximum.

I miss the companion.

I don't think I need a boyfriend.

I need a companion.

Companionship is the most excitement that I could even imagine.

Weekend sucks.

Its not that I love to go to the office.

Itu lagi sucks.

Bosan la oiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!

Kawan-kawan ramai. I know.

But I need a companionship.

Anyone? volunteer?

Haha.

Rasa nak terbang balik JB sebab nak kan companion.

Mummy..abah.. Todt..sobs..sobs..

Uwaaaaa!!!

Macammana?

Macammana nak suruh orang tu blah dari minda dan hati anda?

Bila sesuatu da semakin masam dan tawar,

aku selalu nak buang orang yang berkenaan jauh-jauh.

Sebab kalau difikir-fikirkan..

manusia2 yang heh macam ni lah yang menyesakkan kepala otak.

Menyemakkan hati dan melembabkan minda.

Sampai naik menyampah!

Kalau dulu aku suka...suka sampai macam nak masuk dalam kain!

Bila da start menyampah..rasa nak pi buang je dia dalam longkang.

Manusia..

mana-mana sama.

Sampai naik geli lah!

I've made up my mind.

Manusia itu aku semakin hari semakin geli..

Walaupun dulu menjilat2 suka.. mencanak2 hati kalau dia ajak jumpa..

Tertunggu-tunggu sms dia.

Hek eleh.. dia ingat dia best sangat ke?

Tak best mana pun.. walaupun ada certain2 benda yang best. hehehe

Tapi yang tak best banyak mengatasi yang bestnya.

Manusia tak pernah sempurna.

Hari ni kau kat atas..

aku kat bawah..

esok lusa aku kat atas.. dan saje2 tengok kau kat bawah..

Tuhan kan maha hebat.

Kita lihat la nanti eh..

*aku pun da pernah rasa kat bawah..kat atas.. tengok time lah!*

Ok. sekarang rasa semak.

Tengok blog shie kin.

aku pun rasa down. Macam berjangkit.

Heh betul..

;-)

Rasa dan layan.

Aku hidup dengan banyak perkara yang aku tak suka kala ini.

Tapi tetap layan jelah.

Tak suka duduk KL.

Rasa nak balik JB. Oi..KL tak best!:)) sebab takde Todt.

Tak suka nak kerja.

Rasa nak jadi suri rumah, isteri, dan lady of leisure

Tak suka manusia pushy.

Rasa nak hempuk dengan diari kerja yang tebal tu

Tak suka manusia cemburu kat aku

Rasa nak bagitau satu dunia yang takde apa yang patut dicemburukan dengan aku yang hidup atas tak sampai bawah tak jejak ni.

Tak suka takde duit

Rasa hendak cari duit tepi tapi masih cari cara

Tak suka manusia berlagak yang konon tak heran..

Rasa macam nak sepak muka diorang

Tak suka takde companionship

Rasa nak cari satu untuk buat berbual dan menjadikan dia satu keperluan

Tak suka mummy abah jauh dari aku

Rasa macam nak bungkus kain baju dan terus balik kampung

Ehh...banyaknya rasa..

Aku cuma stress sikit.

Memandangkan banyak manusia heh disekeliling.

Rasa macam nak pengsan!

Oi. mari layan rasa-rasa yang entah hape2 je ni. Menyampah!;-)

Ratu drama dan suka mencari perhatian.

Orang kadang2 juga cemburu.

Bila kau susah hati, bermuram durja- dia suka.

Bila kau baru happy sikit- dia sakit hati.

Ala..lantak lah.

Kalau kau geli..aku pun!

Time kau jadi attention seeker, aku diam je.

Tak cakap apa pun

Bila aku gelama sikit- kau nak berbulu...kenapa?

Tak boleh?

Kau je boleh gelama-gelama?

Aku bujang lagi ok.

Kau tak!

Jadi?

kalau tak suka- sila hide..ataupun delete je.

Takde hal ;-)

Itu pasal aku tulis cam ni...

saya BUKAN superwoman mahupun Lara Croft atau Chun Li

tapi saya adalah

-drama queen

-attention seeker

-gedik/perasan bagus

-materialistik

-hipokrit

-insecure

&

-emosional

jadi

suka?sanggup?mahu?rela?

kalau suka- oklah

kalau tak suka- x kisahla

=)

Terima jelah kenyataan.=)

Kan dah ada disclaimer tu...accept jelah.

Aku memang manusia yang macam ni.

Tuhan jadikan aku dalam form and attitude camni..

Bagi chance sikit boleh tak???? ;-P

Word of advice

I haven't had a chance to have a "woman's conversation" with kaklong for quite sometimes..

So, there it goes..

Last weekend, On Saturday night- we sat on her sofa at the balcony and berasap together. (The activity that Abah couldn't join anymore)

My elder sister,

had gone through a various stages of challenges in her life.

and yet- she made it.

Luckily she still have the wonderful parents and the unpredictable siblings..also her precious asset- Todt,just to make her feel strong and go through all the difficulties ahead.

Well...small talk with kaklong makes me think carefully and made up my mind.

She said something important and showing me the sign that "life is never been easy and you just need to move on"

Me-Moving on- as always.

She said..

• People are more attracted to you if you are interesting!
• Most of the guys that I've met now, are scared of commitment.
• Some of the guys that I've met are only "friends". Not more than that.
• Girls are so clingy at times.
• Guys are more likely to see the "real you"
• Girls are always misunderstood by guys behavior towards them.
• "Busy" is never an issue to a guy if he really likes you.
• Guys and girls have their own agenda.
• Find someone who are really into you and thinks that you are interesting.
• Do not change the way you are even you are officially dating him.

and the magical sentence that came out from her mouth which makes me think- that is fcuking true!

I am smiling and trying to get over and done with the dilemma.

Enjoying the life that only comes once!

Thanks to kaklong for her incredible advise.

Even you are nonsense sometimes..haha :P...I still adore your strength!

Perkara Best di awal April.

Taknak cerita banyak.

Terubat rindu

;-)

Yaya loves you, Todt!